Wednesday, December 7, 2011

Stop me if you think you've heard this one before.


How will the breakup of The Smiths affect the Rudd-Gillard thingo?

To the Canberra Press Gallery.

Chaps, I know it’s the silly season and all and the desk still expects you to file even if nothing is actually – you know – happening in Canberra, but you really need to ease up on the whole “Rudd versus Gillard” thing.

It’s just getting silly.

Witness the current brouhaha over the decision not to give the tender to run the Australia Network to SkyNews*. Instead of focusing on what the decision means in terms of broadcasting policy, how the region perceives us and whether the entire tendering process was a good idea or not - the stuff I rather thought journalists were supposed to do - a goodish chunk of the Gallery decided to focus on how the entire saga reflected on the “Rudd versus Gillard” Strum und Drang.

Spare me.

What’s next?

“Earthquake in China kills thousands, will Rudd challenge?”

“Syrian Government accused of massive human rights violations, can Rudd and Gillard get along?”

“Obama’s nuclear plan reveals stresses within Labor.”

Sit back, have a quiet lie down and a cup of tea and trying and work out what’s important and what isn’t. Because, quite frankly, you’re making yourselves look absurd.

* And stop it with this cutsie-poo typography. That joke isn’t funny anymore**.

** You see what I did there? I worked two Smiths references into the one post. Win!

15 comments:

Alex said...

“Obama’s nuclear plan reveals stresses within Labor.”

This one's barely even a joke at this stage. I used to love political drama, but this has ruined it for me. It's like the only time policies/bills/laws warrant any kind of mention now is when we need to hear about "who the losers will be™" and how pissed-off they are.

Factor in the sickening "Collar Bomb Girl" and "Bali Drug Boy" (which itself became a stupid, baseless Rudd vs Gillard story) efforts -- that ironically came on the back of the anguished "We don't need no stinkin' privacy laws! Stop pickin' on us and imaginin' shit what ain't there!" response to the Britsh phone-hacking blowup -- and the massive pre-occupation with "celebrities", and, well, I've got a pretty sever case of the shits with the Australian news media right now.

My question is: Where can you go that's decent anymore? Even SBS seems a shadow of its former self.

And, as for the CamelCase thing; well, after this effort, I don't think I have it in me to criticise anyone else's abuse of the English language.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Blogs, Alex.

Blogs is where it's at for informed political commentary.

I'd try The Failed Estate or News With Nipples.

I mean, seriously.

How can you not love a blog called "News With Nipples".

Melbourne Girl said...

It's my fault, Ramon, sorry that was me. All my questions about whether Rudd would, asking you all the time, and then all teh journos read that and they can't help themselves.

News with Nipples. Hm, sounds okay but what do they really mean?

Melbourne Girl said...

And by the way, I bet no one else in the country is likely to be waiting on a home delivery of 100 plastic penis bananas.

http://www.sextoys247.com.au/squirting-banana.html

I am only mentioning it because you said nipples Ramon, and also because I am sure I'm indeed the only one who is. Waiting.

Alex said...

Thank you Ramon; they both look very good and I have subscribed to them both.

... but, it does seem a bit sad, doesn't it? I mean, the idea that a couple of self-funded opinion columns can provide better news than a bunch of media organisations with the resources to employ reporters and editors and stuff.

News with Nipples. Hm, sounds okay but what do they really mean?

From the site: Why “News with Nipples”? Well, isn’t that what news is about these days? This blog is about the news and sexism. And sometimes other stuff.

Also, I'm disappointed that sex-toy site only has a picture of the packaging and not the bananas themselves. I'm having trouble imagining what you could get for under four bucks.

squib said...

You see what I did there? I worked two Smiths references into the one post. I was more impressed by Strum und Drang

I bet no one else in the country is likely to be waiting on a home delivery of 100 plastic penis bananas. I am waiting for 30 pot plant self-watering bottles - they drip more than squirt and have a 2 litre capacity, much more sensible

Melbourne Girl said...

Just for you Alex cause I know you care.

I got them for $1.90 each. Woot.

http://www.toysfourplay.com/shopping/index.php?main_page=product_info&products_id=135

*

2 litres squib. Hmmm, much more practical.

Puss In Boots said...

they drip more than squirt and have a 2 litre capacity

I had a sudden and frightening flashback to Imelda just then...

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

It was Imelda wot go me into this blogging caper in the first place.

Alex said...

It was Imelda wot go me into this blogging caper in the first place.

How so, Ramon? I'd only been reading TSSH a short while then. My recollection of who was who and what was what is kind of murky.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Alex, I wrote some comments on TSSH about Imelda's somewhat - shall we say - improbable and lurid sexual claims and Caz and The Hack invited me to become a regular poster.

Good idea or not?

Time alone will tell.

Melbourne Girl said...

Wasn't that also about squirting, Ramon, but of a different kind?

OH AND SQUIB THANKS for your Chrissie missive. You are awesome. Thanks for the hair buttons, Princess was most pleased. We share all of them and they are all still working but very pleased to have a red one and another cowboy. You are ace.

And remember, I don't do Christmas cards, I do New Year's cards. Just fits my timeline better.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Quite, Melbs.

Quite.

Alex said...

Wasn't that also about squirting, Ramon, but of a different kind?

But still centred around the claim of a two litre capacity, from what I recall.

Good idea or not? Time alone will tell.

So far so good, I'd say, Ramon.

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