Friday, June 18, 2010

I battle on, through my pain!

I can't see a fucking thing without my glasses

Oh! pleasant exercise of hope and joy!
For mighty were the auxiliars which then stood
Upon our side, we who were strong in love!
Bliss was it in that dawn to be alive,
But to be young was very heaven!—Oh! times,
In which the meagre, stale, forbidding ways
Of custom, law, and statute, took at once
The attraction of a country in romance!
When Reason seemed the most to assert her rights,
When most intent on making of herself
A prime Enchantress—to assist the work
Which then was going forward in her name!
Not favoured spots alone, but the whole earth,
The beauty wore of promise, that which sets
(As at some moment might not be unfelt
Among the bowers of paradise itself )
The budding rose above the rose full blown.
What temper at the prospect did not wake
To happiness unthought of? The inert
Were roused, and lively natures rapt away!
They who had fed their childhood upon dreams,
The playfellows of fancy, who had made
All powers of swiftness, subtilty, and strength
Their ministers,—who in lordly wise had stirred
Among the grandest objects of the sense,
And dealt with whatsoever they found there
As if they had within some lurking right
To wield it;—they, too, who, of gentle mood,
Had watched all gentle motions, and to these
Had fitted their own thoughts, schemers more wild,
And in the region of their peaceful selves;—
Now was it that both found, the meek and lofty
Did both find, helpers to their heart's desire,
And stuff at hand, plastic as they could wish;
Wcre called upon to exercise their skill,
Not in Utopia, subterranean fields,
Or some secreted island, Heaven knows where!
But in the very world, which is the world
Of all of us,—the place where in the end
We find our happiness, or not at all!

My glasses are still broken, you know.

I hope you lot appreciate this

Excpet Puss, of course.

Puss is a lost cause.


squib said...

My new lenses are tip-top, Ramon. Tip-top! And I have a lovely extra large microfibre cloth. I am all shiny-eyed and very heaven.

Melba said...

Sorry for your pain, Ramon.

No chance for them today or tomorrow? Are you calling the spec place twice a day? Offering to collect them from wherever they will be dispatched? Can you drive without them?

Melba said...

See squib, that's how you do it. Show some empathy for the poor man, at least he brought you poetry!

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Thank you Melbs.

Lemons for you!

I've been ringing the spec place every day and have been given a range of new and exciting excuses each time about why they're not ready.

They're saying Wednesday now.


Anonymous said...

Ramon, I hope that when they come, they aren't faulty or anything. I got a pair once that warped everything just enough to have me knocking things over. Also, maybe you should think about ordering a second pair to keep as spares.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Are we talking glasses or lemons here, Alex?

catlick said...

Ramon is that a shot of you shopped with PhotoAngstPhilter*? So troubled, so hot.

*Patent Pending...

Ramon Insertnamehere said...


It's respresentative of humanity's battle with those cunts at the spec shop.

Melba said...

My lemons weren't faulty, due to special urine-infused growth conditions.

So must be the specs Alex is talking about.

catlick said...

I'm making a lemon marmalade with some sweet gnarly lemons from an ancient tree. It's foaming: gotta go!

Melba said...

Wednesday tomorrow Ramon. How go things? I swear I think I'm more distracted by your sightlessness than by my own (8-day and counting) period of being bed-ridden/housebound.

"Welcome to Winter" the doctor said. Blech.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

They tell me the first pair will be ready tomorrow morning, Melbs.

Once, that statement would have meant so much to me but now all my hopes and dreams have been crushed by bitter experience.

And you've been in bed for eight days? What do you have, typhoid?

Anonymous said...

Considering what I can remember about how typhoid is spread, it'd seem to me to make "welcome to winter" a bit of an odd thing for a doctor to say.

In any event, I hope you're up and about soon, Melba.

Melba said...

Fucking feels like it.

Doctor didn't say what it was, only what it wasn't: flu (all types), sinusitis, etc. Started as a normal head cold but with full face, head and body aches, then went to hot, dizzy, stomach nausea, clammy, cold (but no fever), weak, chesty cough, sputum, off food, tired, so tired, can't do anything except read, no, can't cook dinner, yes, would like the newspaper, thanks, oh and a cup of tea? thanks. No I'll just lie here in bed for the rest of my life and read.

Melba said...

Thanks Alex. And that's ANOTHER reason why I thought you were a guy. You're so literal!

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Typhoid is a serious and sometimes fatal bacterial infection of the digestive system, caused by ingesting food or water contaminated with the bacillus Salmonella typhi.

It causes fever, severe abdominal pain, and sometimes intestinal bleeding.

Just thought people should know.

Anonymous said...

As I understand it, "contaminated" usually equates to "with the faecal matter of an infected person". So, not particularly seasonal.

Sorry about that Melba. Maybe reclusion is taking its toll on my ability to properly detect figurative speech or something. (So, um, which bit did I get wrong?)

Anyway, it sounds like you're in a poorly state. I hope your family is taking good care of you.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Typhoid is typically caused by drinking water or eating food washed with water contaminated by the bacillus Salmonella typhi.

Anonymous said...

Which would almost certainly be water containing some amount of human faeces, wouldn't it?

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Oh indeed Alex, indeed.

catlick said...

This is a Clay Davis/Omar moment, no doubt.

Anonymous said...

*Gasp* What if Melba's mystery illness has been caused by consuming large quantities of urine-nourished lemons.

Melba said...

Oh no Alex you didn't get anything wrong I just meant that when Ramon mentioned typhoid you kind of took it seriously, while I assumed he was joking. Maybe I'm the one misreading things? What's the opposite of literal?

And it's not a mystery illness, it's just a fucking cold that got into my fucking chest and because I'm old and haggard, has taken longer than it used to, to "bounce back."

"Bouncing back" to work tomorrow.

catlick said...

Meanwhile can you clarify when a "quote" is not a "quote"? I am wondering by what process a tender is accepted (because it is the best, or lowest) and then the costs "blows out" and the Govt pays more, much much more (Myki and 100 other projects) or conversely, the project is completed early and the tenderer pockets the change. In what Universe does this make sense? Why is the quote not enforceable? I am mystified (read ignorant)

Anonymous said...

I am also quite curious about how that works, Catlick.

Melba, as far as I know, literal speech is when you intend for your words to be interpreted by their proper (well, literal) meanings; while figurative speech is when you use metaphor or turns of phrase or exaggerate for effect and so forth. I don't know if that also includes irony and sarcasm.

Actually, I think you may be right about Ramon's suggestion of typhoid. And the contaminated lemon thing was my lousy attempt at humour.

Also, I'm glad to hear that you're actually on the mend.

catlick said...

What's the opposite of literal?
Was this perhaps rhetorical?

Anonymous said...

Was this perhaps rhetorical?

Oh. Bugger.

Melba said...

Oh Alex I'm not sure it's worth it now. All I meant was that CLEARLY Ramon was joking about typhoid (well, to me he was) and then for you to talk about typhoid symptoms made me think you had taken it literally/seriously.

When someone takes the words at their face value, in conversation, they are interpreting it literally without taking into account the actual likelihood of it being an accurate interpretation.

It's different to metaphor etc.

That's my take on it anyway.