Friday, May 14, 2010

A PSF that everybody can enjoy

She walks in beauty like the night
Of cloudless climes and starry skies,
And all that's best of dark and bright
Meet in her aspect and her eyes;
Thus mellowed to the tender light
Which heaven to gaudy day denies.

One ray the more, one shade the less
Had half impaired the nameless grace
Which waves in every raven tress
Or softly lightens o'er her face,
Where thoughts serenely sweet express
How pure, how dear their dwelling place.

And on that cheek and o'er that brow
So soft, so calm yet eloquent,
The smiles that win, the tints that glow
But tell of days in goodness spent
A mind at peace with all below,
A heart whose love is innocent.

All complaints, suggestions, whinges along the lines of "I only like poems about trains/owls/giants squids" should be directed to my agent (pictured above).

31 comments:

squib said...

Ah, Byron. Doesn’t he make you just want to put on something Albanian, knock back a few syllabubs, and debauch some servants?

Your agent looks like Behemoth

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

I find having a gigantic biblical monster as an agent very handy, Squib.

And you have servants now?

Melba said...

Lovely Ramon.

You know sometimes I wonder what it would be like to be a man and to love a woman, or even to be a woman and love a woman.

I know that sounds weird but we women really are just so awesome. We have tresses, and even though men can be beautiful, just as much as women, I dunno.

I wonder if the quality of desire is different?

squib said...

By Behemoth, I meant the black cat demon with the pistol from 'The Master and Margarita'

And you have servants now?

Just squirrel ones working in excellent conditions, Ramon

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

A black cat demon with a pistol as an agent would also be ace.

or even to be a woman and love a woman

Any takers - Catholic, Puss?

Puss In Boots said...

I'm not sure what you want to know, Melba. I'm not really sure I'm qualified to answer, either. I would never have an actual relationship with a woman. I think women are maddening. I only lust after women in a physical sense. And as a general rule, women tend to be more attractive than men, and often don't realise it, so there's less of the "I'm beautiful - worship me" stuff as there is with pretty men. I guess the level of desire is somewhat different. With men, I tend to fantasise about them ravishing me, but with women, I just want to stroke their skin.

Melba said...

Thanks Puss. You've articulated what I supposed might be the difference. Women are so hard on themselves so you're right, often they don't know how gorgeous they are, and men all too often do.

For me, that poem, written by a man about a woman, was touching in a way that I don't think could be achieved by a woman writing about a man. The same with "Come live with me and be my love..."

Perhaps it's my feelings about a sensitive, loving man and how appealing that is that makes it powerful more than anything else. But I do think a woman's neck, cheek, eyebrow, throat, tummy, ear can be beautiful in a way that a man's probably isn't.

squib said...

I always think it's a lot easier to draw a woman. They have more form. Men are kind of messy

Perseus said...

I once asked my ex what she was attracted to with me, and she started blabbing on about loyalty and companionship and security and I said, "No, I mean, physically" and she said, "Um, oh, well, er... you have really good ankles."

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Not your tresses then, Pers?

Melba said...

Are you for real, Perse? If a woman got that as a response then there'd be hell to pay.

Ankles?

eat my shorts said...

Beautiful.

And there's nothing wrong with having good ankles, but I don't think I'd want that to be the first thing someone thinks of when I ask what it is that makes me physically attractive to them.

Actually, I have been told I have nice ankles. But I was told I have other nice stuff as well, but I'm too modest to tell you here.

Ok, that's a lie. I'm not that modest, I'll tell you. My boobs, my hair and oddly, my toes. I don't like toes as a rule. To be honest I don't like feet at all. I don't like having people's feet near me.

And the 'w' on my keyboard isn't sticking anymore, but the 2 is. Odd.

eat my shorts said...

Beautiful.

And there's nothing wrong with having good ankles, but I don't think I'd want that to be the first thing someone thinks of when I ask what it is that makes me physically attractive to them.

Actually, I have been told I have nice ankles. But I was told I have other nice stuff as well, but I'm too modest to tell you here.

Ok, that's a lie. I'm not that modest, I'll tell you. My boobs, my hair and oddly, my toes. I don't like toes as a rule. To be honest I don't like feet at all. I don't like having people's feet near me.

And the 'w' on my keyboard isn't sticking anymore, but the 2 is. Odd.

eat my shorts said...

Oops, double post. Sorry.

The enter key isn't sticky, so I don't really have an excuse for that.

Cath said...

As a person who was always told as a child that it was a shame I was born so late in the century, as people just didn't appreciate good ankles anymore....I feel for you Pers.

Melba said...

I too have excellent ankles but like EMS said, I wouldn't be happy if it was top o' the list. There should be at least one or two other things before the ankles.

Or was she an ankleist?

Perseus said...

Yes Melba, all true.

After some pushing Andromeda 3.0did add that I had 'nice eyes', which was probably the nicest thing she said to me in the 6 years we were together.

Oh, she once congratulated me on my punctualty.

I always go for the hard ones. In 3 years, the nicest thing Ponygirl has ever said to me is, "That purple shirt is not as gay as I thought it would be."

We're lovers again by the way. I might post the update on Monday.

Alex said...

Well, this thread has become a bit of an eye opener. And that's not counting Perseus' news.

Do you draw too, Squib? A lady with many hats. Personally, I reckon that women are way more fun to draw, but men are easier. I find I can really exaggerate the features with men and they still end up looking okay. If I get careless with women, they end up like drag queens. It's funny how you subconsciously develop ideas on the physical characteristics of masculinity and femininity. It reminds me of the days when I used to flick through porn catalogues and have a chuckle at the models in the male on male section. I found that it's fairly easy for blokes to look rugged or suave, but when they try to pull off sensuous or seductive, the results are usually laughable. Of course, others may feel differently.

Also, people are worried about the attractiveness of ankles now? My ankles are mysterious. They live inside the legs of my trousers and never come out.

And tresses are, like hair, right? It's not a euphemism for something else, is it?

Melba said...

People are worried about the attractiveness of ankles.

Everything can have an aesthetic, Alex. Everything.

Melba said...

And oooooh Perseus. You might post the deets on Monday?

You old tease.

And you do have nice eyes.

Alex said...

And the 'w' on my keyboard isn't sticking anymore, but the 2 is. Odd.

It's contagious. Or it's an operational issue with your left ring finger. One or the other.

eat my shorts said...

I did injure my left ring finger a few years ago. But that shouldn't be affecting it now.

I'm just worried that it's going to slowly spread itself around the keyboard, letter by letter to deliberately drive me bonkers. I reckon it'll go for the 't' next.

Oh, and Perseus, I saw a barge on the Regents Canal at Camden today and it was named Perseus. I didn't think to get a photo of it though to show you. Sorry dude. Next time, next time.

Boogeyman said...

Puss said... With men, I tend to fantasise about them ravishing me, but with women, I just want to stroke their skin.

So, what would you do with a man with soft skin, Puss?

Puss In Boots said...

If he has soft skin, he's either gay, or metrosexual. I don't like metrosexuals. I don't like men who spend more time in front of the mirror than I do.

Boogeyman said...

If he has soft skin, he's either gay, or metrosexual.

For someone who's travelled around the world, Puss, you seem have a very insular, ocker Australian view of male grooming.

As any true blue Ozzie would tell you, a 'real man' (aka tradie for a lady, blokey bloke, etc) is rugged, doesn't wash, doesn't take care of his appearance, wears King Gees, drinks Valvoline, and only moisturises his skin with the sump oil from the truck engine he's just fixed. Anything else is just metrosexual, or gay, or possibly both.

Puss In Boots said...

I wouldn't have gone that far with the definition. When I say metrosexual, I mean the ones who take grooming just a little too far. Like I said, I don't like men who spend longer in front of the mirror than I do. Which, for the record, is approximately 5 minutes. And that includes teeth brushing time.

Alex said...

Puss, how do you manage to get your teeth clean in under 5 minutes? That's motoring.

As any true blue Ozzie would tell you, a 'real man' [...] drinks Valvoline

A real man is John Laws?

Anything else is just metrosexual, or gay, or possibly both.

Funnily, I was pretty old before I discovered the concept of homosexual men as effeminate or overly primpy and it still seems kinda odd to me. None of the poofs* I knew were anything like that. They were just ordinary blokes (rugged/grimy/whatever) except they had a best mate that they spent all their time with instead of having a girlfriend.

*I was also pretty old before I found out that 'poof' could be offensive. Even the gay people I knew didn't use the word 'gay'.**

**Probably because none of them ever mentioned it at all. It was all "don't ask, don't tell" in those days.

Boogeyman said...

Puss, I assume that 5 minutes doesn't include blade shaving.

Puss In Boots said...

Alex, I have an electric toothbrush, and it counts down from 2 minutes to tell me when I can stop brushing.

I also don't wear make up (unless it's a special occasion, or I'm meeting someone for the first time, or something - then I'll go with mascara and lip gloss, but still not a full face), and the only thing I do with my hair is brush it, and then either put a hair tie in, or a headband on.

So yeah, I'm pretty low maintenance when it comes to getting ready.

However, all my hard work at efficacy is done over by my shoe collection. It takes me an age to work out what shoes I want to wear sometimes.

Puss In Boots said...

Boogey, no, it doesn't include shaving. I wish the boy would blade shave. So much smoother.

Perseus said...

I only ever blade shave.

And I can blade shave and brush my teeth in five minutes.

There's no muckin' about in my bathroom!