Friday, December 10, 2010

Emily Dickinson really should have gone out more

"Couple of jars? Tonight? That would be grand!"

I taste a liquor never brewed –
From Tankards scooped in Pearl –
Not all the Frankfort Berries
Yield such an Alcohol!

Inebriate of air – am I –
And Debauchee of Dew –
Reeling – thro' endless summer days –
From inns of molten Blue –

When "Landlords" turn the drunken Bee
Out of the Foxglove's door –
When Butterflies – renounce their "drams" –
I shall but drink the more!

Till Seraphs swing their snowy Hats –
And Saints – to windows run –
To see the Tippler
Leaning against the – Sun!

37 comments:

squib said...

I reckon she was a closet tippler

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Indeed Squib, but with a bottle of sherry muttering "Why doesn't Suzanne like me in the same way I like her" late at night sort-of-way.

oldeboots said...

I reckon she's had one too many hyphens.

Kettle said...

Tramampoline! Trambampoline! Shit sorry, got to share this with the Melbourne people. The best coffee shop in Sydney has just opened a cafe in Melbs; if you're anywhere near Fitzroy, check it out and let me know what you think:

http://www.camposcoffee.com/

[Apols for not doing the link properly; blame the sauv blanc.]

PS, drinking sauv blanc with Ems, in spirit, the old lush.

Kettle said...

Whoops sorry, Carlton Vic.

Alex said...

Kettle, you're at a point where you're confusing sauv blanc with VB? No wonder a link was out of the question. I'm surprised you can even type.

Kettle said...

Good Lord, Alex, even if I was dying of thirst in the desert I would'n't drink VB (or confuse it with anything other than battery acid).

I've now got a glass of Pinot Noir and I've moved on to reading Frankenstein. I've sobered up considerably.

It's the whole 'a href' thing with URL links; it's not exactly intuitive (for me anyway, I know you have more of a propensity for all things IT).

Anyhoo, Frankenstein... Who doesn't want my Saturday night?

No-one, that's who.

Alex said...

Um, so when you said Carlton Vic, you meant the coffee shop was in Carlton, Victoria? Sorry, my bad.

The trick to making HTML intuitive is to remember what all the abbreviations and initialisms stand for: a href = anchor hypertext reference. See, simple.

Anyway, I'm at home in front of a computer, too. So don't feel like you're the only one living the exciting life.

squib said...

I recently had a poem published about Frankenstein, Kettle

Kettle said...

Squib my only question then is: why have you not sent me a copy?

Terribly remiss.

Kettle said...

Anyway, I'm at home in front of a computer, too. So don't feel like you're the only one living the exciting life.

Yeah but I'm betting, Alex, that you were HTML-ing up a storm while I was just getting cranky with M. Frankenstein.

Lewd Bob said...

I maintain there's so little difference between VB, Melbourne Bitter, Carlton Draught and even Crown Lager (The Bogan Boutique Beer) that the average punter could not tell the difference.

squib said...

why have you not sent me a copy?

because nobody but nobody wants to read my poems... sniff

Kettle said...

why have you not sent me a copy?

because nobody but nobody wants to read my poems... sniff


Hmm, Squib, this is interesting logic, is it not?

I would consider that my question, "Why have you not sent me a copy?" carries within it the implication that I would expect a copy, given that you have sent, and I have enjoyed, your poems in the past.

This implication being the case, your statement, "Because nobody but nobody wants to read my poems... sniff" makes no sense, and is, in fact, non-sense.

Unless, of course, you have (somewhat bizarrely) renamed me 'Nobody But Nobody' and are referring to me in your statement in the third person, i.e. "Because Nobody But Nobody (namely you, Kettle) wants to read my poems." Indeed, but if anything this throws even less light on why you have not sent me (a.k.a. Nobody But Nobody, a.k.a. Kettle), your Frankenstein poem since I do actually enjoy reading your poems.

All I can say is, you'd better send me your Frankenstein poem quick because I've got about three pages to go and I'm about to move on to David Sedaris's Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk and that's going to require a whole different kind of poem.

Alex said...

I'm about to move on to David Sedaris's Squirrel Seeks Chipmunk

Kettle, you'll never know how much it weirded me out to hear you say that after the weekend I've just had. Suffice to say, the last few days have been full of squirrels that stubbornly refused to stop looking like chipmunks.

Kettle said...

Now you're going to have to do a weekend wrap, Alex!

Puss In Boots said...

I believe that may be my fault, Alex, and I do sincerely apologise!!

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

How so, Puss?

And I'm also very keen to learn more about Alex's squirrels.

I didn't know we even had squirrels in Australia.

Puss In Boots said...

We don't. We're the only continent (apart from Antarctica) that doesn't have squirrels. Although there is a colony in WA that escaped from the zoo, but it has been contained.

As for why Alex is drawing squirrels that look like chipmunks, she very kindly agreed to do the artwork for my Save the Date cards :)

squib said...

Kettle, I was only trying to feel sorry for myself. Very few people like poetry and it's a bit depressing at times, especially you know, if you write them. Then again, it's fitting in a way, trundling along writing stuff that people don't read in a universe that has no point

Alex said...

Certainly no occasion for apologies, Puss. It's been a joy and I am richer for the experience. Twas just such an odd occurrence for Kettle to pull that out of the blue.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Then again, it's fitting in a way, trundling along writing stuff that people don't read in a universe that has no point.

You should put that in a poem, Squib.

squib said...

hah! yes

eat my shorts said...

PS, drinking sauv blanc with Ems, in spirit, the old lush.

Ahh. Sauv blanc. Lovely. But too cold over here for it at the moment. I've a hankering for some mulled wine though.

And, just an interesting little facty fact for you - the cheapest wine I can buy here is Australian or New Zealand wine. Bit funny considering how far it has to travel to get here.

Has anyone here made mulled wine before?

Alex said...

From what I've heard, EMS, the Aussie wine industry has been going through a bit of a collapse due to a glut in supply. Some of the stuff has apparently been worth less than bottled water.

Kettle said...

Squib I'd never considered there are people who don't read poetry. Imagine!

Reading poetry for me is like being in love: everytime you run through it you feel good. Why miss that, eh.

Kettle said...

Has anyone here made mulled wine before?

Not made it, EMS, but partaken of it. Funnily enough a pal from England made it for us. Hey how are you spending Christmas this year? Paris?

Puss In Boots said...

Kettle, I don't read poetry. I find it irritating. It's like the author was too lazy to write a full story.

Kettle said...

Puss I may simply have an undiagnosed attention deficiency disorder. Anything over a page is too long; too long I tell you!

Mr E Discharge said...

I may simply have an undiagnosed attention deficiency disorder.

Pay no attention to it, it's all in your mind.

Kettle said...

Excellent, Mr E; it's out of mind already (my newly minted banana chair was a great aid to the process).

Alex said...

Well Kettle, maybe you should swing by The Opera House and see if Oprah can sort your condition out. Who knows, you might be able to gain an audience between her raising of the dead and turning water into wine*.

*Possibly mulled

Kettle said...

Oprah, gah; I just can't see the point.

I'd rather read a chess book cover to cover than watch a moment of Oprah; honest to God, a chess book.

Kettle said...

I should say, I'd be happy to reconsider Oprah if she really could turn water into wine (especially mulled). I'd reconsider anyone if they could do that.

Now that I've been rather unsubtle about my opinion of Oprah, does anyone, um, like her? Ahem (oops).

Alex said...

Oprah herself I couldn't really care less about. If she's found a foolproof formula for separating idiots from their money through television chat-show evangelism, then I say good for her. What gets up my nose is the insane fawning that seems to be coming from all corners. Even the news channels have been running packaged promo clips for her show in their entirety. For the love of crap, there must be something going on in the world that actually matters. And, I suspect that more than a little of this "Oprah mania" is less about genuine interest in the woman and more a display of basic herd mentality. I mean she comes on here at what, one o'clock in the afternoon? How many people are even watching telly at that time?

eat my shorts said...

Hey how are you spending Christmas this year? Paris?

Nope. Canterbury. That's where my flatmate's sister lives. Providing it doesn't snow and we cant travel, of course. If it snows and we can't travel then we'll be stuck in London.

I'm looking forward to going to the cathedral on Christmas Eve.

As for Oprah, I used to like watching it when I was a uni student, but then they took it off free to air and I haven't seen it since. I've studiously avoided any book that has ever featured in her book club. I think. Except for The Colour Purple. Which I'm assuming was in her book club. You'd think it would have been, wouldn't you? I'd Google it but I CBF.

squib said...

turning water into wine

Don't you mean water into free pearl necklaces?