Those Germans, eh!

"I'm wearing an octopus hat and I'm really, really pissed. Espanol! Espanol! Espanol "

The World Cup is over for another XXX years* and I’m sure most people here have forgotten most of it already.

Indeed, the only thing anybody will ultimately remember is the amazing performance of Paul, the psychic octopus.

For those who arrived late, this amazing cephalopod mollusc has correctly managed to predict the outcomes of all the games played by Germany and that Spain would win the Cup for the first time EVAH!!

In the course of his career, Paul managed to piss off a great number of people, including most of Germany when he predicted (again, correctly) that Germany would lose to Spain and be knocked out of the competition.

The ABC notes

Stung by Paul's "treachery" at picking Spain over Germany in last Wednesday's semi-final, some sections of the 350,000-strong crowd watching the game on giant screens in Berlin sang anti-octopus songs.

What. The. Fuck?

What sort of freak writes “anti-octopus songs”?

In German!

The PETA people have also tried to get into the action by putting out a media release demanding something, something but they can fuck right off.

* As you may have guessed, I’m a hit hazy about the details.

Shame!

A national disgrace!

It seems that a giant squid – let’s call him “Jim” had a friend, another giant squid called “Bert”*.

Jim had arranged for Bert to attack a ship some months earlier and now Jim feels that Bert owed him a ship attack.

“Sure,” said Bert, “there was a ship I attacked earlier but it didn’t really work out. I can set you up with the ship to attack if you like. I’m sure it will be up to it.”

Now, I for one am appalled that giant squids are pimping out ships for their friends to attack. It’s disrespectful to the ships.

I much prefer the approach they have in Sydney, with a small group of professional giant squids meet in quiet groups to find similarly minded ships.

It’s so much more dignified.

* Not their real names, obvs.