Thursday, December 3, 2009

Boxing: WTF?

''Everyone who doubted me, shove it up your bottoms, you don't know shit … to all the critics that bagged me, you don't know jack shit"

Hmm.

Australian Danny Green (pictured) smashed American Multi World Champion Roy Jones Jr in 90 seconds last night. Smashed him. Beat him to such an extent that the referee called it off before the end of the first round.

Good on them. I don't care if they want to fight each other, if they want to break each other's noses and damage each other's brains irreversibly in a fit of testosterone-charged violence. I actually quite like watching top level boxing and I certainly don't think it should be banned. But why the hell would you do it?

I like the theatre too. The mutual respect hidden behind the inevitable weigh-in face-off at the press conference where they shout inarticulate half-sentences at each other.

Ape-men, acting out man's most primal instincts, i.e. to fight each other. Once upon a time - in stone-age times - winning a fight was rewarded with the right to rule the clan, and the loser was shunned. Now, both participants get shitloads of money and the winner, a fuck-ugly belt.

Progress?

13 comments:

Alex said...

But why the hell would you do it?

Because it makes you feel like a big man.

That's my best guess. Honestly, I have no idea what the appeal of boxing is. From a spectator's point of view, I find it to be possibly the most boring of all the so-called "combat" sports - almost none of which seem to have anything much to do with actual combat.

Lord Gravy said...

I LOVE boxing.

I think it's called boxing. You know, where 2 or more naked women wrestle in mud/jelly/my bed.

Elite sport!

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Tony Abbott is an ex-boxer.

Maybe we should ask him.

squib said...

That would explain those funny boxer ears he has

How do you even know stuff like that, Ramon?

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

I read lots of weird stuff, Squib.

Not as weird as Bob's stuff, true, but weird enough.

squib said...

So, it's not bordering on stalker-ish then?

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

No, no.

Nothing like that Squib.

I certainly haven't driven past The Monk's delightful Sydney home on repeated occasions.

And I certainly have no interest in attempting to saw through the brake-line on his car.

So, no.

wari lasi said...

Or cook the family rabbit Ramon?

You don't need to take the piss out of Abbott, he is a parody of himself.

Andrew Gerald Hales said...

I would box just so people would look at me as a BAAADAAASSSS!!!!

Perseus said...

Didn't Mundine beat Danny Green last year?

Love 'The Man'. Love him.

Leilani said...

Who named the Abs "The Mad Monk"? The first time I heard it was at a Rod Quantock show.

Alex said...

Who named the Abs "The Mad Monk"?

According to Abbott, it was Michelle Grattan. For more Tony Abbott trivia, the 7:30 Report ran a Mad-Monk-Super-Special on Tuesday night that can still be viewed here, here, and here.

WitchOne said...

I love that he won't say arse but he will say shit.

Yup, cleaning it up for the meedja!