Thursday, October 2, 2008

A message of peas to the world

I get any number of oddball messages in my inbox, women writing “Ramon, you sexy beast, fill me with your mighty organ*”, that sort of thing.

But now comes the most exciting message of all.

A chap by the name of Arthur Stubbs writes;

my name is Arthur Stubbs and I would like to draw Your attention to the Project "IntoSpace.org".

I have found Your contact email address on blogspot.com and my impression is that You are a respectable blogger**. That is why I have decided to make a cooperation proposal. The Project is an unprecedented space advertising campaign that aims at compiling and sending a catalog of photos and logotypes into outer space.

Please, visit Project blog or on blogspot and consider special offer for bloggers. Official site of the Project is intospace.org

Fell free to share this information with Your friends
.

Crikey, a chance to send TSFKA into space! Picture it comrades; Perseus’ dud romantic life, EMS’ tales of wacky high-jinks at her school, Puss’ increasingly alarming series of quirks, me calling everyone on the Age a cunt – all blasted into space to circle the earth.

With luck, it may even make contact with alien lifeforms.

Man would be a fool to pass up such an opportunity.

*To which my response is “Dear Madam, I’m sorry, but I do not have a ‘mighty organ’. I do however possess a broken toy piano. Trust this will suffice.”

**I am now considered a “respectable blogger”, so the rest of you can get fucked
.

UPDATE.

I've just noticed, this is TSFKA's 100th post. Who'd have thunk it.

29 comments:

Boogeyman said...

This looks like a great way to scare off intelligent life - let them read the collective dross of the blogosphere.

A chap by the name of Arthur Stubbs

I didn't think Stubbadub was into whacky space alien projects.

Perseus said...

Stubb is hoping the aliens have cured obesity.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Stubba's got his fingers in a great many projects, Boogey.

I'm hoping the alien's first message to the world will be "Has Perseus finally got a root?"

Boogeyman said...

I'm hoping the alien's first message to the world will be "Has Perseus finally got a root?"

...and if not, would he like to meet our sister?

Her young scales are the most delicate shade of green, and she has lots of nubile appendages. W00t!

Perseus said...

Her young scales are the most delicate shade of green, and she has lots of nubile appendages.

Yeah, I'd hit it.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Pers, your tryst with beings from beyond is still preferable to Sarah Palin.

Perseus said...

Speaking of Palin, this made me laugh.

Desci said...

Oh, also Pers, look out for this (sfw): http://www.tinynibbles.com/blogarchives/2008/10/oh-my.html

Perseus said...

"No anal required"

Gold. Still, they're not paying much. If someone did look like Palin enough and was prepared to do the gig, they could ask for a lot more than $2k.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

they could ask for a lot more than $2k.

Oh, I dunno.

$2k is about standard for no anal.

Umm.

So I'm told.

Boogeyman said...

You know Perseus, it could be a good career change for you. Consider:

i) Healthy paycheck for a couple of hours work,
ii) Minimal outlays and ongoing expenses,
iii) Guaranteed exposure to a eager, receptive audience,
iv) You get to meet lots of women,
v) You get paid extra to do things you're probably doing in private at home anyway.

Frankly, I can't see why you're still persisting with this 'band' caper.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

I would like to apologise to any alien lifeforms for all the smut in this blog.

I would also like to say

DESCI STARTED IT - VAPORISE HER!!!

wari lasi said...

I would like to apologise to any alien lifeforms for all the smut in this blog.

There's no smut on this blog. Witchie and I make some throw away comments about haveing a virtual affair and we get thrown to the canvas.

We need more smut on this blog. There is far too much intelligent discourse taking place for my liking. I want more on Perseus' (and my) live life (or lack thereof) please.

wari lasi said...

I mean "having" and "love life". Fat fingers this morning

Perseus said...

My lovelife and yours have been been blackbanned by people more powerful than us, Wari.

I did get a root two weeks ago though. See, naysayers? I kept it to myself for this long! Besides, getting a root is not nearly as interesting to write about as not getting one.

wari lasi said...

You're right Perseus, people revel in pathos.

It's a poor comment on human nature.

And congrats on the shag. I dare not discuss my exploits of late, I'm still smarting from a thrashing I got from Atari et al a long time ago.

Mr E Discharge said...

Well, so much for Mister "I have nothing to hide".

It's the deceit that hurts the most.

I hope you're proud of yourself, Perseus(if that is your real name)(I doubt it).

Please cancel my subscription to Perseuspeare forthwith.

-Very disappointed reader.

Perseus said...

Sheesh. Not get a root, I sadden you. Get one, I disappoint you.

Now I know how Joan of Arc fe-e-e-e-elt.

Mr E Discharge said...

Welcome to the glare of the media spotlight!

Perseus said...

Speaking of which, Helen Razer has been sacked from the ABC Arts program according to today's paper.

My faith in humanity: Restored.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Helen Razer has been sacked from the ABC Arts program

I noticed that too, Pers.

My initial response was

YOU FUCKIN' RIPPER!!!!!!!!

I might post on this, when the high has worn off.

wari lasi said...

Who the fuck is Helen Razer?

And is anyone coming up for the PNG Orchid Spectacular this weekend? It'll be huge.

Definitely not to be missed.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

Everything you need to know about the delightful Ms Razer can be found here wari.

Warning - contains a photo of Ms Razer.

shitbmxrider said...

that photo needs to come with a warning to get a rusty spoon....your gunna need it to scoop your eyes out to releive the pain

wari lasi said...

Did you look at the website Ramon? I think Arthur Stubbs is a spiv.

Good luck to him I suppose.

catlick said...

"No anal"
Razer's sacked, 3 cheers. After seeing that ick pic the only work she'll be getting is DVDA.

Fad MD said...

only work she'll be getting is DVDA.

DVDATO

Jannie Funster said...

I hope it's for the blue aliens, the last ones I had were so freaking green they didn't even know how to get the fudge to soft-boil stage. So we ended up pouring it on pancakes. Or made it so hard we used it for hockey pucks.

But they did give me money.

Which I spent on IntoSpace.org stock.

And now I'm rich. So I blog all day and night. And eat strawberries.

Ramon Insertnamehere said...

DVDA

I had to google that, catlick.

And by crikey, aren't I glad that I did!